2012 as a whole...


It is almost 2013 and I am so looking forward to it.  In fact, hubby and I have been counting down to the new year ever since Thanksgiving.  It's been quite a year for us.  When we look back on it now, we can't help but laugh.  But in the moment, facing everything, there weren't very many laughs.  I don't want this post to reflect on all of the bad things that happened in 2012, but instead, want to focus on how the challenges have helped us moving into 2013.  I want to be able to look back on this post this time next year and realize that while 2012 wasn't the greatest for us, it really brought us to where we are in that moment.  I also want to share 2012 through photography, since that played such a major role in my life in 2012.  So, here I present to you, 2012 as a whole: 

roof collapse-July 2012
This really was the highlight (0r lowlight, rather) of our year.  After having moved so many times the last few years, we were excited to sign a 2nd lease in our current apartment in May.  Shortly after we resigned, in July, a bad storm hit our apartment building and the roof collapsed, leaking all 12 units in the building.  This was a very rough month for us, as we were put out of our home, and spent several weeks at Alex's parents' house.  In the end, after almost 2 months of phone calls, trips back and forth, and a very angry Kelly, we moved to our current apartment (owned by the same company).  While I'm not the happiest with our current apartment (cue the fruit fly infestation and mouse we still can't find), this move definitely gave us the motivation we needed to find a new place to live.  We are very excited that our lease will be expiring in May of 2013 and we will be looking to move to either a townhome or a house.  This move will be great for us and will start us on our journey towards finding a permanent (or mostly semi-permanent) home to start a family.

pieces of a box/moving
photographed August 2012
photographed August 2012
At the beginning of 2012, one of my "goals" was to enhance my photography.  After sending my Nikon D50 on a long "vacation" to be cleaned, I was so so happy to welcome it home by taking a million photos.  This year, I took photography to a whole new level by trying different techniques, using different settings, and using lots of natural light.  I kept lots of my photos unedited and I really loved how they turned out.  I also got great use out of my tripod (thanks Mom!) and it really helped me capture some beautiful photos, like the one above.  In 2013, I plan on taking my photography to even more advanced levels.  I pulled out my Nikon D50 User Guide that my sister gave me several years ago and plan to read it cover to cover this year and really "get to know" my camera on a personal level.  I'm really looking forward to this accomplishment. 

dealing with anxiety

This year, my anxiety kicked my butt, 10 times over.  I had a very bad anxiety/panic attack near the end of this summer that few people know about.  I really didn't talk about it in public too much, not even to my family and friends.  It really consumed me and I found it difficult to go on.  I missed work and laid around for days.  This time in my life was truly one of the most difficult I ever had.  I lost sight of who I was, what I wanted, where I belonged.  I was sincerely convinced I wouldn't be able to shake this off.  But somehow, I did.  I'm mostly convinced that it was through the help of my hubby, my best friend, and my therapist, that I was able to go on.  I really was ashamed and embarrassed that I let my anxiety consume me in such a large manner, but when I look back on it now, it is one of the best things that could have happened to me this year.  While it was an extremely hard time in my life, it was something I definitely needed: a reawakening.  It really made me stop and assess who I was and where my life was going, and what was truly important to me.  I let alot of activities go that I no longer enjoyed and learned that I really need to stop and appreciate each day.  It also made me reassess my priorities and what needs to come first.  (I've been struggling for the past several years to get my priorities straight, and consume my role as a wife, a furry mom, and a sister and a friend.  Slowly, I am getting to the point I think I should be).  In 2013, I will be taking on new adventures that will help me cope with every day life and with my anxiety.  I'm looking forward to learning to keep myself grounded and to learn to "let go" and just enjoy the ride that life brings. 


our kids...for now.

Alex and I have had many conversations about kids this year.  As expected, we're getting alot of pressure to have kids soon.  This is both exciting and scary for us.  We both want to be parents so very bad and feel that (for the most part) we are ready for kids.  But, we also don't want to bring a child into this world until we feel we can give that child everything they deserve: a home to grow in, lots of time and attention, and enough money to have everything they need.  And right now, we don't feel that we are quite there yet.  But, we are preparing and planning for our future and our future children.  While in the beginning of this year, we hardly talked about a timeline for kids, we are certain that we both are on the same page as to when we want to have kids.  Until then, Murphy and Maria are our kids.  One thing I worry about is our furry children going to the waist-side once we have children.  I don't want that to be a worry, but it is.  I love both Murphy and Maria dearly and want to be able to balance having actual children and furry children together.  Until I feel that can be accomplished, our furry children take center stage.  I want to spend 2013 enjoying my time with them while I can.  It is no hidden secret that both of them have health issues and we don't know how long they will be around.  I want to get to know them even more and appreciate each day they are around while I still can.  They deserve that.

Create.  Inspire.  Freely.
Finally, my crafting.  (Doesn't everything always lead back to crafting in the end?)  This year, I took on lots of challenges and accomplishments.  I challenged myself to create more 12x12 layouts, and I've created more this year than I ever have in my crafting career.  I also wanted to challenge myself, as well as others, and hosted many challenges at Club CK.  I also challenged myself to try new things in my scrapbooking, which I feel I did.  I loved looking back at my crafting journey this year (in creating my 12 fav crafty projects of 2012).  I have been thinking the past several weeks of how I want to take on 2013 with my crafting.  There are so many promising adventures coming up: in January I will begin my 6-month term designing for Practical Scrappers, I will be starting a Project Life-type scrapbook where I create one layout per month that is either a collage of the month's events or a feature of one event that happened during the month, I also am taking on the challenge of completing me and my hubby's wedding album, and finally, to help cope with my anxiety, I have decided to take on Ali Edward's One Little Word challenge.  I decided that for 2013, I will not be hosting any challenges on Club CK, but may participate in a few.  I've also decided not to set any "new years resolutions" for 2013, including in my crafting.  Sometimes I feel I set too many "to-dos" for myself.  I really want to see where crafting takes me.  Most of all, my #1 goal for crafting in 2013 is to create and inspire freelyI'm letting go of expectations for myself and things that I feel I must do.  I want to renew the "why" of crafting: why I create.  This is going to be big for me in 2013 and I'm truly ready to take on this one and true challenge. 

Thank you for taking the time to read this.  Two thumbs up for you if you made it all the way to the end!!!  I really think 2013 will be wonderful for my hubby and I and we are so excited to see what directions it will take us.  What are you looking forward to in 2013?

xoxo, 


Kelster Jean

1 comment:

  1. I hope 2013 will be great for you & hubby. I also hope you take care of yourself & things wont get so overwhelming for you. Hopefully you can join us in August. Would be great to meet you in person! Happy New Year!

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